What About Me, When Is It My Turn

Fuckin Fuck You All Goddamn Shit Fuckin Fucks

The 'Phuqin' Phreaq
6 June
External Services:
  • the_phreaq@livejournal.com
update: 11-20-05
song of the week:
Lockness by Judas Priest

song of the month:
Empire by Fear Factory

pornstar of the year:
sexxxy luna - bang bros(big tits round asses)

quote of the week:
"Hey god, I really don’t know who I am. In this world of piss."

word of the week:
can you say it. good. now lets use it in a sentence.
I can't seem to get my shit together, i don't know what to do i'm lost in this hole of shit i've accumulated.


what are you thinking right now:
I.... I, I just wanna be happy.

uuummm, bio....... shit........ right, uuummm. okay

alittle about me:
my name: lets just say i'm the phreaq

home town: i have no idea

birth place: the bronx

places lived/existed: born in the bronx, moved to oswego, then to mount vernon, then to new rochelle, then to rochester, then to safety harbor, then to clearwater, i should be moving once more by the end of the year

age: i am forever, i go to sleep and wake up as somebody else, i have always been, now and forever until the end of time

as a kid:
video games: atari genesis nintendo super nintendo gameboy arcades hand-held tigers, tv(see below), movies(see below), music(see below), comics, drawing..... i think thats it, lets see tv, video games, comics, drawing........ yeah thats it, did i mention i never left the apartment
as of 17 to 25:
anger, pain, depression, rubbing alcohol, lysol, bengay, music(see list below), tv(see below), horror, terror, fear, thinking, and thinking about girls, asking what about me, dwelling on the past, playstation, porn, cutting things into my arm(words, tick tac toe pattern, lines)
as of 25 and up:
knives, baseball bats, guitars, horror, random, ridiculous, weight lifting, exercise, mental preparation, over thinking, pain, wrestling, video cameras, recording music, playstation2, pc games, muttering to myself, rambling on and on, violence

school: gee, lets see, i got left back in the 8th grade, left back in the 9th grade, and so on and so on, until i was kick out for being 20 years old and not being a senior, so i had to get my ged

marital status: alone, painfully alone, now and forever, mentally i don't know if i'm able to have a relationship, at least not a healthy one

mood: crazed, psychotic, mad, deranged, manic, calm, relaxed, peaceful

favorite comic book/s: lobo, spawn, the crow, evil ernie,

favorite character: lobo, wolverine

favorite tv show/s: the kids in the hall, seinfeld, married ...with children

favorite cartoon/s: ren and stimpy, beavis and butthead, the tick

favorite movie/s: silence of the lambs, natural born killers, seven, a clockwork orange, hellraiser III, the texas chainsaw massarce, the shining

favorite movies to quote: apocalypse now, full metal jacket, dirty work, natural born killers

favorite 80's movie/s: a christmas story, the goonies, stand by me, legend, (see the rest below)

favorite music: metal, classical, opera, punk, punk metal

favorite band/s: metallica, pan fuckin tera, green day, nine inch nails, tool, alice in chains, the doors, pink floyd

favorite guitarist/s: kerry king, steve vai, kirk hammett, dimebag darrell, zakk wylde, tony iommi, jimi hendrix, dave mustaine, larry lalonde, adam jones, david gilmour, jerry cantrell

favorite quote/s: "its good", "WHAT ABOUT ME.......WHAT ABOUT ME.........WHAT ABOUT RAVEN", "have a nice day", "you slimy scumbag you make me wanna vomit", "you goddamned communist heathen", "and then I says, tell me I'm wrong! and he says, 'I can't baby, 'CAUSE YOU'RE NOT!"

favorite things to say: get some, maaaaaaaaann, ridiculous, faggit, bang, where, oh yeah well, beat your face with my fists, rip open your head with my bare hands and eat your brain, what son, goddamn communist, you rat, whaaaaaaaat

favorite past time: being angry, looking to the future, playing with my knife, completing the list of things to get, weight lifting

favorite food: pizza, gummie worms, italian food

favorite drink: not much of a drinker, but mai tai is good enough for lobo, good enough for me


they said it, where, i i HA HA HA don't touch me, where was i supposed to go, she was in the way, she was everywhere i went.


The List Of Material Possessions That Make Me A Little Happier:
the poseidons blade
smith & wesson m4505
bc rich kkv
line6 spiderII 210
crybaby from hell wah wah pedal
ibanez grx45
sony vaio rb34g
audio trak maya1010
lean mean fat reducing grilling machine
my plastic skull jose
rca rs2527 personal mp3 CD player
sony handycam camcorder (dcr-trv280)
wylde overdrive
dime distortion
louisvile slugger model sb9
weider weight bench 135


The List Of Things To Get:
kfk ten band eq
kodak printer dock plus
camera phone
two 100 lb barbell plates


Things To Get When I Move Out:
craftsman 16 in. electric chain saw
true temper 3.5 lb. single bit ax with 36" hickory handle
louisville mlb225yb wood baseball bat


video games
ps2/silent hill, resident evil, the suffering, grand theft auto 3 and up, wwe smackdown, tenchu
first person shooters/quake, doom, wolfenstein, half life 2, alien vs predator2...etc
recording music on my computer/cakewalk, wave editor, goldwave...etc


thrash, speed, death, black, heavy metal, southern, guitar, punk, hard rock, rock n roll
metallica fuck you they kick fuckin ass, slayer, megadeth, anthrax, pantera, sepultura, motorhead, black sabbath, iron maiden, judas priest, drain sth, kittie, lita ford, joan jett, the plasmatics, gwar? sometimes, primus, green day, the offspring, rancid, blink 182, sum 41, nine inch nails, marilyn manson, tool, a perfect circle, white zombie, ministry, aphex twin, rammstein, alice in chains, nirvana, pearl jam, soundgarden, mad season, korn, mudvayne, static x, system of a down, slipknot, killswitch engage, morbid angel, cradle of filth, children of bodom, dimmu borgir, satyricon, fear factory, guns n roses, skid row, ozzy osbourne, queen, pink floyd, rush, kiss? sometimes, lynyrd skynyrd, led zeppelin, van halen, reo speedwagon, bachman turner overdrive, steppenwolf, creedence clearwater revival, the eagles, deep purple, jimi hendrix, the doors, janis joplin, the who, the rolling stones, the beatles, elvis presley, frank sinatra, dean martin, sammy davis jr, bing crosby......


horror-gore-slasher-thrillers-suspense/friday the 13th I III IV VI VII VIII, nightmare on elm street I II V, halloween I II VI, childs play I II III, hellraiser, the texas chainsaw massacre 1974 1994 2003, hannibal lector trilogy, psycho I II IV, american psycho, house of a thousand corpses, most troma films, most full moon films, killer klowns from outer space, the exorcist, the omen, poltergeist, rosemary's baby, living dead series night of dawn of day of, carrie, natural born killers, justine, se7en, 8mm
stanley kubrick/the shining, 2001, full metal jacket, a clockwork orange, paths of glory, dr strangelove, eyes wide shut
jim carrey/ace ventura, dumb and dumber, me myself and irene, the truman show, man on the moon, the mask,
80s movies-kids movies/stand by me, explorers, the goonies, lost boys, license to drive, gremlins I II, ghostbusters I II, revenge of the nerds I II, bill and ted's excellent adventure, a christmas story, monster squad, back to the future I II III, d.a.r.y.l., the hobbit, legend, labyrinth, the princess bride, the never-ending story, flight of the navigator, gi joe the movie, transformers the movie, back to school, uhf, little monsters, vice versa, the burbs, porkys.....etc


cartoons/2 stupid dogs, aaahh!!! real monsters, the adventures of the galaxy rangers, aeon flux, animaniacs, aqua teen hunger force, bananaman, beavis and butt-head, beetlejuice, bobby's world, bonkers, the brak skow, the brothers grunt, bucky o'hare and the toad wars, camp candy, cartoon planet, captain caveman & the teen angels, captain caveman and son, captain n: the game master, captain power and the soldiers of the future, chip 'n dale rescue rangers, the completely mental misadventures of ed grimley, count duckula, cowboy bebop, cow and chicken, the critic, danger mouse, darkwing duck, dennis the menace, denver the last dinosaur, dexter's laboratory, dino-riders, dinosaucers, doug, dr. katz professional therapist, drawn together, duckman, ducktales, earthworm jim, eek and the terrible thunder lizards, family guy, fat albert and the cosby kids, the flintstones, fraggle rock, freakazoid, futurama, gi joe, garfield and friends, gargoyles, gary the rat, get along gang, ghostbusters, go-bots, goof troop, grape ape, the gumby show, gummie bears, he-man and the masters of the universe, the head, the herculoids, hillbilly bears, histeria, hong kong phooey, hulk hogan's rock n wrestling, i am weasel, inspector gadget, jackie chan adventures, jem, the jetsons, johnny bravo, josie and the pussycats, josie and the pussycat in outer space, kid notorious, king of the hill, the little mermaid, the maxx, mega man, mighty max, mighty mouse, monchhichis, muppet babies, my pet monster, pac-man, paddington bear, the pink panther, pink panther and sons, pinky and the brain, the pirates of dark water, the plastic man comedy adventure show, the plucky duck show, popeye, popeye and son, a pup named scooby-doo, quick draw mcgraw, rambo, raw toonage, the real ghostbusters, the ren and stimpy show, ren and stimpy adult party cartoon, the ripping friends, rocko's modern life, rugrats, samurai jack, savage dragon, schnookums and meat funny cartoon show, scooby doo where are you, secret squirrel, she-ra princess of power, shorties watchin shorties, silver surfer, silverhawks, the simpsons, snagglepuss, the snorks, sonic the hedgehog, south park, space ghost coast to coast, spawn, speed buggy, spider-man, spider-man and his amazing friends, spongebob squarepants(fucking hate this fucking show), star trek the animated series, static shock, stripperella,

tv shows/227, 3rd rock from the sun, the a-team, absolutely fabulous, the addams family old, the adventures of pete & pete, airwolf, alf, alfred hitchcock presents, all in the family, amen, the benny hill show, bernie mac show, beverly hills 90210, chappelle's show, charles in charge, coach, the cosby show, the crocodile hunter, csi, da ali g show, dear john, def comedy jam, diff'rent strokes, dinosaurs, doogie howser m.d., dream on, ecw, ecw on tnn, empty nest, family matters, fear factor, the flash i watched it but didn't like it, fraggle rock, freddy's nightmares, the fresh prince of bel-air, full frontal comedy, full house, get a life, get smart, gilligans island, gimme a break, g.l.o.w. gorgeous ladies of wrestling, golden girls, the greatest american hero, growing pains, happy days, harry and the hendersons, herman's head, hey dude, hey vern it's ernest, home improvement, hotel erotica, house of buggin', i love the...70's 80's 90's, in living color, the incredible hulk, insomniac with dave attell, it's garry shandling's show, jackass, the feff foxworthy show, the jeffersons, jenny, kate and allie, kids in the hall, knight rider, la femme nikita, lady chatterley's stories, land of the lost, laverne & shirley, living single, lost in space, m*a*s*h, made, madtv, mail call, malcolm in the middle, the man show, married ...with children, martin, max headroom, maximum exposure, method and red, mighty morphin' power rangers, millennium, a minute with stan hooper, mister ed, mister rodgers neighborhood, the monkees, mork and mindy, mxc, mr bean, mr belvedere, mtv cribs, the munsters old, the muppet show, my two dads, mystery science theater 3000, new york undercover, newsradio, night court, night gallery, night stand with dick dietrick, one day at a time, the osbournse, the outer limits old, oz, parker lewis can't lose, pee-wee's playhouse, perfect strangers, pimp my ride, police squad, punky brewster, quantum leap, reading rainbow, roc, rowan & martin's laugh-in, sabrina the teenage witch, salute your shorts, sanford and son, saturday night live, saved by the bell, saved by the bell the college years, scrubs, sctv network, seinfeld, sesame street, the sharon osbourne show, sherman oaks, silk stalkings, silver spoons, six million dollar man, small wonder, son of a beach, the soup, spy tv, star trek, star trek the next generation, star trek deep spce nine, star trek voyager, the state, step by step, sunday night heat,


Random Shit That Pops In Or Out Of My Head:

Where is it, WHERE IS IT. I don't know. Oh you know where it is, you just like it when I fuck you. Don't you? DON'T YOU? Lying piece of shit. I'll give you 'till the count of three, to give it to me. 1.......2........ I DON'T KNOW WHERE IT IS. SHUT THE FUCK UP and keep your legs open. I SAID SPREAD YOUR FUCKIN LEGS. You worthless lying little bitch. You see this knife. DO YOU SEE THIS KNIFE? YES! I want you to lick it. Go on and lick it, you piece of shit. DO IT or so help me, I will slit your fuckin throat. Thats right, lick it bitch, lick both sides now. LICK THAT FUCKIN KNIFE. Faster, Faster. Yeah lick the edge now. LICK THE FUCKIN EDGE BITCH. I want you to cut your fuckin tongue. Alright I'll do it for you. AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH. WHERE THE FUCK IS IT. Point to it. YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO CUT ME, You Fucking idiot. It better not be deep. Get the fuck off me. YOU FUCKING IDIOT. THIS IS GONNA NEED STITCHES. BANG, bang

"Death? What you all know about death? Ya smoke this shit so to escape from reality? Me, I don't need this shit. I Am Reality. There's the way it ought to be, and there's the way it is. And you want to kick ass. Yeah. Well, here I am, all by my lonesome. And there ain't anybody gonna know. Six of you boys against me. Kill me Yeah, I shit on all of you!"

I am The Phreaq, The Lunatic, The Hate-Monger...... Where Am I..... I Can't See, I Can't Hear, Trapped In The Darkness, The Blackness, The Hand Of Death Grips Me, My Pain Is Pleasure......

Screamed hell from above

"Do I look like someone who cares about what God thinks?"

"Oh bliss! Bliss and heaven! Oh, it was gorgeousness and gorgeousity made flesh. It was like a bird of rarest-spun heaven metal or like silvery wine flowing in a spaceship, gravity all nonsense now. As I slooshied, I knew such lovely pictures!"

"And I said “well how comes I’m always doing what you tell me to do but then you never do what I say to?” And he said ‘Well blah blah blah” So I said “now you do what I say“. And he said “no.” I said “you do exactly what I say!” And he said “no.” “I’m telling you! I’m not asking you! I’m telling you! You do exactly what I say!"

someone once said you can be anything you want, if you just put your mind to it, if you put your mind to it you can accomplish anything.
i can't remember who said it.
but it really doesn't matter.
they're probably dead.
so they can't see the anger in my eyes as i scream WHY CAN'T I DIE

"Unbearable, Isn't It? The Suffering Of Strangers, The Agony Of Friends......There Is A Secret Song At The Center Of The World, And Its Sound Is Like Razors Through Flesh, You Can Hear Its Faint Echo Right Now. I'm Here To Turn Up The Volume. To Press The Stinking Face Of Humanity Into The Dark Blood Of Its Own Secret Heart.......But You Don't Have To Hear The Music Just Come To Me And I'll Free You From The Future.......Don't Debate With Me, Just Come Here And Die While You Still Have The Option Of Doing It Quickly."

"This Could Happen To You Baby, This Could Happen To Anybody"

"And so he says to me, 'You got legs, baby, you're everywhere. YOU'RE ALL OVER THE PLACE!"

"happy birthday baby jesus.......you look fantastic"

"Does anybody here remember Vera Lynn
Remember how she said that
We would meet again
Some sunny day
Vera! Vera!
What has become of you
Does anybody else in here
Feel the way I do ?"

I wanna go home (i wanna go home i wanna go home)
Take off this uniform, and leave the show (leave the show leave the show)
And I'm waiting here in this cell (waiting in this cell)
Because I have to know (because i have to know because i have to know)
Have I been (have i been have i been)
Guilty all this (guilty all this time)
Guilty all this time

"i said you do whats best for you, you do what you feel is right, you do what you think is right, now whatever you think is right its got to be right, all i'm doing is, i'm walking with you, I walk the line with you, and i'm holding the line with you, what you do is up to you, its got nothing to do with me"


L is for the way you look at me (look at how shiny it is)
O is for the only one i see (feel it in my hand)
V is very very extraordinary (only one bullet)
E is even more then anyone that you adore can (CLICK, CLICK)
Love is all that i can give to you (its to cold)
Love is more then just a game for two (it will be over soon)
Two in love can make it take my heart and please don't break it (right after this song)
Love was meant for me and you (why)
L is for the way you look at me (i saw her again today)
O is for the only one i see (feel it in my hand)
V is very very extraordinary (she didn't even look my way)
E is even more then anyone that you adore can (CLICK, CLICK)
Love is all that i can give to you (its so cold)
Love is more then just a game for two (she walk right by me)
Two in love can make it take my heart and please don't break it (spin, click)
Love was meant for me and you (spin, click)
Love was meant for me and you (spin, click)
Love was meant for me and you (spin,..............

"gone are the days of normalcy, gone are the days of conformity, i feel your pain, i am your opportunity for salvation, isn't it time you come with me, for i shall set you free, quote the raven nevermore"


"he screams and screams and pounds his head against the wall until wailing phantom firetrucks paces across his vision.
pain, pain is all he wants.
and hate, yes hate.
we shall never forget and never forgive.
and never ever fear.
fear is the enemy.
fear and bullets."

"Look Down At Me, You Will See A Fool.
Look Up At Me, You Will See Your Lord.
Look Straight At Me, You Will See Yourself"

i often think when i see people waiting for the bus, why not, who's to stop me. they stand so close to the edge of the curb, what if i were to just grab an old woman by the back of the head, and throw her face first in to the bus before it stops. what do you think the first words will be out of their mouths...........oh my god. what does that even mean. BANG, bang
80's movies, a christmas story, a clockwork orange, a pretty face, alice in chains, annie sprinkle, art, bandages, beavis and butthead, big van vader, black sabbath, blaspheming, blood, blood soaked panties, blood soaked tampons, breasts, burton c bell, cactus jack, chaos, charlie manson, cocoa pebbles, comic books, cradle of filth, danni ashe, dean martin, death, deep purple, destruction, dimebag darrell, donuts, doug bradley, drawing, dykes, ecw, evil ernie, fear factory, fitness women, frank miller, frank sinatra, ghostbusters, goonies, gore, gothic babes, green day, gremlins, guitars, gummy slappers, hate, headbangers ball, heavy metal, hellraiser, horror, inflicting pain, iommi, iron maiden, jae lee, james o'bar, jim carrey, jimi hendrix, k-m-d, kane hodder, kerry king, kids in the hall, killing, king and country, kirk hammett, knives, led zeppelin, lesbians, lobo, mad season, mankind, marilyn manson, married... with children, masochism, mayhem, megadeth, metallica, mindless rambling, mtv oddities, mudvayne, murder, neil diamond, nine inch nails, nirvana, ok computer, ozzy, pain, pantera, paps blue ribbon, peanut butter captain crunch, pearl jam, perfect strangers, phreaq, pink floyd, pizza, playing with knives, pop-tarts, porn, poseidons blade, punk chicks, quim, rage, rain storms, random, raven, ren and stimpy, rogering, rush, sabu, sadism, sammy davis jr, scarring, se7en, seinfeld, simon bisley, simon coldwater, singapore cane, skulls, slayer, slipknot, soft women, someone who cares, stabbing, steve vai, suffering, suicide, swinging bats, tattoos, terror, the beatles, the dude, the great muta, the maxx, the rat pack, the texas chainsaw massacre, the tick, the vandals, the who, thrash metal, todd mcfarland, tool, tortured souls, true heart-stopping terror, violence, wendy o'williams, women in general, working out, yngwie j malmsteen, zakk wylde